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Gossip Columnist: Emmet "The It Man" Bane
Fifty Would-Be Superheroes of RhyDin September 21, 2010
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be a superhero' And before you yell at me, I know what you're going to say. But Emmet, you breathtakingly handsome fellow! RhyDin does have its very own superheroes that protect us!
Well, you have heroes, RhyDin, but that doesn't necessarily mean they are super. You can't call yourself super unless you have your own line of action figures and you wear silk and spandex underneath your everyday clothes. And sorry, Cor, but you still don't count.
Under your very nose, alter egos and superhero identities could be proliferating. Is your best friend one of them"
Without further ado, I give you: Fifty Would-Be Superheroes of RhyDin!
By Day: Teagan Rielea By Night: "Se"ora Sarcasm" Her powers are reeeeeeaaaaaally impressive.
By Day: Chris J. By Night: "I Swear I'm Really a Man Man" How much is it going to take for him to prove it to you?
By Day: Red 'ur Thorne By Night: "Fantastically Feminine Fiend" Her alter ego is just a ruse. Deep down, we know there is a lady in there somewhere. Deep, deep down.
By Day: Locke D'Vestavio By Night: "The Incredible Shrinking Man" Being around ice frequently has to have some long-term effects, after all.
By Day: V. Winters By Night: "Empress Intense" No. She's seriously very interested in how you like your coffee.
By Day: Elazul By Night: "Captain Commando" Is it breezy in here, or is it just us"
By Day: Gwen Minx By Night: "The Shrieking Shillelagh" Call her for help or use her as a blunt object. The limits are endless!
By Day: Darius M. By Night: "Ambassador Ambiguous" He may be interested in helping you? or he may not.
By Day: Kazzy Hart By Night: "The Human Wastebasket" She'll polish off your plate when you don't feel like taking home a doggie bag.
By Day: Z'ev Zayveon By Night: "Mister (Meester) Claw" Just one phonetic letter away from being a holiday philanthropist. Wait a second"
By Day: Toby Aradam By Night: "Generic Superhero Man" Because they ran out of initials to monogram onto his t-shirts.
By Day: Harris D'Artainian By Night: "Harris D'Artainian" Only because we wouldn't want to see him in spandex.
By Day: Koyliak VanDuran-Simon By Night: "Inappropriate Conversation Woman" Because the meaning of life and marital problems are much better to discuss in the midst of that volcanic explosion, anyway.
By Day: Connar Valdor By Night: "The Whispering Wombat" His hero speech would be the most touching and invigorating you'd ever hear" if only you could hear it.
By Day: Wyheree Ravenlock By Night: "Repressed Rager" When she snaps, the whole world goes up in flames. Or ice, as it were.
By Day: Lizzie L. By Night: "Gullible Girl" There's a surprise waiting for her in that airless empty bank vault' Awesome!
By Day: Katarina Smith By Night: "Superslim" She swears she doesn't diet. It's just her metabolism.
By Day: Myrlene Spiritor By Night: "The Whammy Hammy" She also goes by: The If It's Not One Thing It's Another Kid.
By Day: Ixonia Vorah By Night: "The Avianator" Come a little closer. She'll give you the bird.
By Day: Viktor Kazon By Night: "Bob" We like that name better, anyway.
By Day: Tenacity By Night: "The Crisis Averter" She's totally cool with there being danger" as long as she isn't a part of it.
By Day: Rico Tharadon By Night: "Deputy Disorganized" Just give him a minute to find his pants, then he'll get to saving you.
By Day: Kuro Inzen By Night: "Spazzy McGee" Sometimes A.D.D. is a bit of an understatement. For when you'd like all your problems partially yet energetically completed. Sort of.
By Day: Audrey Horne By Night: "The Algebraic Operator" She'll solve your problems mathematically' as long as they aren't above an eighth-grade level.
By Day: Bashir Ergin By Night: "Passive Aggressive Man" No, he's not angry with you. That door was just asking for a violent slamming.
By Day: Johnny Smith By Night: "Baron Black Bangs" If you put him in sunlight, he sparkles.
By Day: Darcy Huntington By Night: "Identity Crisis Kid" She's a vampire! She's a dragon! Wait' a human! Wasp! Throw pillow! No, I figured it out! She's" I'm getting a cup of coffee.
By Day: Rand alTan By Night: "Because I Can Man" What' You don't hear us asking questions.
By Day: Lucien Mallorek By Night: "Erector Cialis" Because everyone deserves to smile for one reason or another.
By Day: Riley O'Rourke By Night: "Predatory Furred Thing of Ridiculous Proportions Girl" She's not compensating. It's not her fault everyone just happens to be smaller and weaker than she is.
By Day: Tara Ryneiyn By Night: "The Postman Prowler" Who needs a guard dog anymore"
By Day: Mur Ollavan By Night: "(The) Arguably Successful Spellslinger" Acronyms" What acronyms"
By Day: Fiora Shantalaine By Night: "The Palavering Paper-Pusher" Your most reliable office hero between the hours of nine and five.
By Day: Kate By Night: "Captain Sno Ball" Squishy and pink on the outside, dark and delicious on the inside. Mm-mm. I think I'll keep that one.
By Day: Roran By Night: "Monsieur Overbite" He would be so much more entertaining with a French accent, anyway.
By Day: Misty By Night: "Cat Lady" Not to be confused with Catwoman. This is rather the kind that accumulates cats.
By Day: Rekah Illyriana By Night: "Supergnat" As interesting as Superfly, but with the potential to be much more annoying.
By Day: G'nort Dragoon-Talanador By Night: "Innuendo Man" He wants to show you his sword. And he fully intends to stick you with it.
By Day: Rhiannon Brock By Night: "Trust Fund Kid" Like the girly version of Bruce Wayne, only without the cool gadgets.
By Day: Antonio Falconne By Night: "The Drink Skink" He'll ensure that you are thoroughly intoxicated by noon, but if he takes the trouble to wear a codpiece, you darn well better tip him.
By Day: Kendall Bree By Night: "The Caffeinator" Unless that is a cup of espresso in your hand, walk away. No, seriously. Walk. Away.
By Day: Stephen Kidd By Night: "Rash Man" No, we're not talking about being reckless.
By Day: Arts By Night: "'I Don't Do Pretty' Woman" No, we're not being smart.
By Day: Brian Ravenlock By Night: "The Redundant Ruiner" Now we are.
By Day: Victoria Helmshaw By Night: "The Fanfare Femme" Followed everywhere by applause reels. Please, do get up.
By Day: Aizen By Night: "The Perpetual Lecturer" He will save you from your own hubris" if you pay attention long enough.
By Day: Juliane Smith By Night: "Madame Maniacal Laughter" Her cackle is second to none, and can trump any puny super villain's.
By Day: Alper Ergin By Night: "What's-His-Name Man" It's a bird! It's a plane! It's" someone I don't recognize.
By Day: Lite By Night: "Sergeant Oblivious" Whoa. Did you know this list is about superheroes?
By Day: Sheridan Driscol By Night: "Professor Procrastination" He'll get to your problems eventually.
Fifty Would-Be Superheroes of RhyDin September 21, 2010
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be a superhero' And before you yell at me, I know what you're going to say. But Emmet, you breathtakingly handsome fellow! RhyDin does have its very own superheroes that protect us!
Well, you have heroes, RhyDin, but that doesn't necessarily mean they are super. You can't call yourself super unless you have your own line of action figures and you wear silk and spandex underneath your everyday clothes. And sorry, Cor, but you still don't count.
Under your very nose, alter egos and superhero identities could be proliferating. Is your best friend one of them"
Without further ado, I give you: Fifty Would-Be Superheroes of RhyDin!
By Day: Teagan Rielea By Night: "Se"ora Sarcasm" Her powers are reeeeeeaaaaaally impressive.
By Day: Chris J. By Night: "I Swear I'm Really a Man Man" How much is it going to take for him to prove it to you?
By Day: Red 'ur Thorne By Night: "Fantastically Feminine Fiend" Her alter ego is just a ruse. Deep down, we know there is a lady in there somewhere. Deep, deep down.
By Day: Locke D'Vestavio By Night: "The Incredible Shrinking Man" Being around ice frequently has to have some long-term effects, after all.
By Day: V. Winters By Night: "Empress Intense" No. She's seriously very interested in how you like your coffee.
By Day: Elazul By Night: "Captain Commando" Is it breezy in here, or is it just us"
By Day: Gwen Minx By Night: "The Shrieking Shillelagh" Call her for help or use her as a blunt object. The limits are endless!
By Day: Darius M. By Night: "Ambassador Ambiguous" He may be interested in helping you? or he may not.
By Day: Kazzy Hart By Night: "The Human Wastebasket" She'll polish off your plate when you don't feel like taking home a doggie bag.
By Day: Z'ev Zayveon By Night: "Mister (Meester) Claw" Just one phonetic letter away from being a holiday philanthropist. Wait a second"
By Day: Toby Aradam By Night: "Generic Superhero Man" Because they ran out of initials to monogram onto his t-shirts.
By Day: Harris D'Artainian By Night: "Harris D'Artainian" Only because we wouldn't want to see him in spandex.
By Day: Koyliak VanDuran-Simon By Night: "Inappropriate Conversation Woman" Because the meaning of life and marital problems are much better to discuss in the midst of that volcanic explosion, anyway.
By Day: Connar Valdor By Night: "The Whispering Wombat" His hero speech would be the most touching and invigorating you'd ever hear" if only you could hear it.
By Day: Wyheree Ravenlock By Night: "Repressed Rager" When she snaps, the whole world goes up in flames. Or ice, as it were.
By Day: Lizzie L. By Night: "Gullible Girl" There's a surprise waiting for her in that airless empty bank vault' Awesome!
By Day: Katarina Smith By Night: "Superslim" She swears she doesn't diet. It's just her metabolism.
By Day: Myrlene Spiritor By Night: "The Whammy Hammy" She also goes by: The If It's Not One Thing It's Another Kid.
By Day: Ixonia Vorah By Night: "The Avianator" Come a little closer. She'll give you the bird.
By Day: Viktor Kazon By Night: "Bob" We like that name better, anyway.
By Day: Tenacity By Night: "The Crisis Averter" She's totally cool with there being danger" as long as she isn't a part of it.
By Day: Rico Tharadon By Night: "Deputy Disorganized" Just give him a minute to find his pants, then he'll get to saving you.
By Day: Kuro Inzen By Night: "Spazzy McGee" Sometimes A.D.D. is a bit of an understatement. For when you'd like all your problems partially yet energetically completed. Sort of.
By Day: Audrey Horne By Night: "The Algebraic Operator" She'll solve your problems mathematically' as long as they aren't above an eighth-grade level.
By Day: Bashir Ergin By Night: "Passive Aggressive Man" No, he's not angry with you. That door was just asking for a violent slamming.
By Day: Johnny Smith By Night: "Baron Black Bangs" If you put him in sunlight, he sparkles.
By Day: Darcy Huntington By Night: "Identity Crisis Kid" She's a vampire! She's a dragon! Wait' a human! Wasp! Throw pillow! No, I figured it out! She's" I'm getting a cup of coffee.
By Day: Rand alTan By Night: "Because I Can Man" What' You don't hear us asking questions.
By Day: Lucien Mallorek By Night: "Erector Cialis" Because everyone deserves to smile for one reason or another.
By Day: Riley O'Rourke By Night: "Predatory Furred Thing of Ridiculous Proportions Girl" She's not compensating. It's not her fault everyone just happens to be smaller and weaker than she is.
By Day: Tara Ryneiyn By Night: "The Postman Prowler" Who needs a guard dog anymore"
By Day: Mur Ollavan By Night: "(The) Arguably Successful Spellslinger" Acronyms" What acronyms"
By Day: Fiora Shantalaine By Night: "The Palavering Paper-Pusher" Your most reliable office hero between the hours of nine and five.
By Day: Kate By Night: "Captain Sno Ball" Squishy and pink on the outside, dark and delicious on the inside. Mm-mm. I think I'll keep that one.
By Day: Roran By Night: "Monsieur Overbite" He would be so much more entertaining with a French accent, anyway.
By Day: Misty By Night: "Cat Lady" Not to be confused with Catwoman. This is rather the kind that accumulates cats.
By Day: Rekah Illyriana By Night: "Supergnat" As interesting as Superfly, but with the potential to be much more annoying.
By Day: G'nort Dragoon-Talanador By Night: "Innuendo Man" He wants to show you his sword. And he fully intends to stick you with it.
By Day: Rhiannon Brock By Night: "Trust Fund Kid" Like the girly version of Bruce Wayne, only without the cool gadgets.
By Day: Antonio Falconne By Night: "The Drink Skink" He'll ensure that you are thoroughly intoxicated by noon, but if he takes the trouble to wear a codpiece, you darn well better tip him.
By Day: Kendall Bree By Night: "The Caffeinator" Unless that is a cup of espresso in your hand, walk away. No, seriously. Walk. Away.
By Day: Stephen Kidd By Night: "Rash Man" No, we're not talking about being reckless.
By Day: Arts By Night: "'I Don't Do Pretty' Woman" No, we're not being smart.
By Day: Brian Ravenlock By Night: "The Redundant Ruiner" Now we are.
By Day: Victoria Helmshaw By Night: "The Fanfare Femme" Followed everywhere by applause reels. Please, do get up.
By Day: Aizen By Night: "The Perpetual Lecturer" He will save you from your own hubris" if you pay attention long enough.
By Day: Juliane Smith By Night: "Madame Maniacal Laughter" Her cackle is second to none, and can trump any puny super villain's.
By Day: Alper Ergin By Night: "What's-His-Name Man" It's a bird! It's a plane! It's" someone I don't recognize.
By Day: Lite By Night: "Sergeant Oblivious" Whoa. Did you know this list is about superheroes?
By Day: Sheridan Driscol By Night: "Professor Procrastination" He'll get to your problems eventually.