- The RhyDin Post's black and gold logo flashes with an epic, orchestrated introduction theme. The logo spirals off the screen, and displays a brand new, renovated high-tech news studio with several flat screen television sets, projected RhyDin Post Sports hologram images, and in-action moving images of famous dueling legends projected on a few walls. At the bottom of a modern, massive, glass-covered black granite and mahogany desk are scrolling digital scores from the latest matches in the Outback, Arena, Twilight Isle and Annex. Two men sit behind the desk. To the left (Peter Pham) is in his early thirties, of Asian ethnicity, has gelled black hair, and is in a black suit. To the right (Chris Reed) is of Caucasian ethnicity with dark brown hair, is in his late thirties, is wearing a navy suit, and has a vertical scar running down one side of his face. Both men, equipped with headsets, smile at the camera. -

Peter: How's it going, RhyDin" I'm Peter Pham, sports columnist!

Chris: And I'm Chris Reed, and for those of you who will never get to where I am, fame is delicious.

Peter: Thanks for tuning in with us tonight! Since Madness is fast-approaching, we decided to take a short break from scheduled matches and challenges and bring you an excellent showcase that took place this past Saturday between Rhiannon Harker and an up-and-coming duelist named Theron Mahariel. Now as far as we know" - He is interrupted by rattling. " Chris" What is that"

Chris: Oh, this" This is my new pet Jean. - Pulls out a cage with a rattlesnake inside. " Say hello, Jean!

Peter: JESUS! - Recoiling, terrified. "

Chris: No, Pete. Jean. Jesus is a little pretentious to name a pet, don't you think"

Peter: Chris, what the heck are you thinking" Rattlesnakes are deadly! They can't be pets!

Chris: That's just society. Dogs were domesticated, weren't they' Jean can be a good pet once you get to know her. - The rattlesnake hisses and shakes its rattle at Peter. " See" She likes you! - He nudges the cage closer to Peter. "

Peter: - Jerking away. " I swear to god, if you do not get that thing away from me, I will shoot it and then you.

Chris: You seem awfully tense, Pete. Something as small as Jean can't hurt you. You're engineered!

Peter: Against environmental antigens! My blood isn't laced with anti-venom!

Chris: Oh, calm down. She's just stir-crazy because she's been stuck in a cage all day. I'm sure she'll calm down once I-

Peter: - As Chris reaches for the latch. " Chris, NO!

Chris: - The cage is open. " See" She's perfectly"

- The snake flies out of the cage and bites Peter's shoulder, attaching itself firmly as Peter screams and falls out of his chair. "

Chris: Bad, Jean! Bad! Who has a spray bottle"!

- There is much activity going on behind the cameras. Several crewmembers are huddled around Peter. "

Chris: Uh' Pete"

- No words are clearly audible, but there is muttering by the staff. Chris frowns. "

Chris: - To someone off screen. " What do you mean, an ambulance" I can't do this show by myself! - More muttering off screen. " Cancel" No we can't cancel! I need the money for Madness betting!

- Sounds of Peter being wheeled away on a stretcher. Chris seems anxious. "

Chris: Hey' hey you! - He's looking at the camera. " Yeah, you. Come on. You're going to do the show with me. No, not you" Yes, you. Get over here.

- Warily a Drow makes his way on screen. He is wearing a headset of his own, but is dressed in a t-shirt, jeans, and vest. His white hair is tied back in a braid. "

Chris: Sit down. You're going to do commentary with me.

Drow: Usstan xun naut telanth Rivvin. - Holding his hands up helplessly. "

Chris: - Clearly doesn't understand. " Right there. Just sit and comment on the fight. It's not rocket science. What's your name"

Drow: Usstan xun naut telanth Rivvin! - Sitting down cautiously. "

Chris: Hussein" Nice to meet you, Hussein. Now we're just going to run this fight as if it's any other one that we've had before. You've worked here, so you know what we're doing.

"Hussein": Usstan xun naut kampi'un dos, ush'akal.

Chris: Awesome. I'm glad we could come to an understanding. And hey, thanks for stepping in. I honestly don't get why Pete is being all drama-queeny. Jean isn't poisonous. They're thinking of corn snakes. - A crewmember comes on screen and whispers something into Chris's ear. His eyes widen. " Oh. Uh' did anyone see where Jean went'

- Roll footage Round 1, 2, and 3. HC/HC 0 All; CP/FCP 0 All; TH/TH 1 All. "

Harker: She spun her blade downward in a graceful parry to stop Theron's blade from cutting her, but he had mirrored it. She went aggressive this time around and lunged for Theron's midsection. Again, he had the same idea! She gritted her teeth and grunted.

Mahariel: He met her with an equal strike and looked to his armor. He backed away and was glad Drake skin was tough as hell.

Chris: Now! Unless I'm mistaken, Mahariel is not a fighter that we've seen on the standings " at least not recently. So I am pretty relieved that he spends the first couple of rounds testing the waters with Harker. She may not look it initially, but that broad is very tactically intelligent.

"Hussein": Usstan tlun er'griff ghil whol natha heen wun magthere Usstan tlun plynnin. Usstan phlith jous chaon.

Chris: You took the words right out of my mouth, Hussein. Mahariel's form is very similar's to Harker's. Where did this fighter come from"

- End footage Round 3. Roll footage, Round 4 and 5. HC/HC 1 All; LC/FSS 2-1 Mahariel. "

Harker: Her blade came up in a wide arc for Theron's shoulder and again blades collided.

Mahariel: He met the blade once more, his arm lifted to rest under the curve of his blade as he met hers once more. He caught her off guard and spun low bringing his blade flat to knock her feet from under her. He stood and assumed the same stance but offered to help her up.

Chris: Oh, beautiful. Beautiful! I don't know where this guy came from, but Mahariel's extension is almost flawless. It is not at all as disjointed as Harker's upper-hand seemed to be, and when he transitions he does it as naturally as breathing. Even more impressive is that he manages to do so by keeping his blade out of Harker's line of sight, which is no doubt where her folly lies.

"Hussein": Llaar. Ka jala uss kyorlee nindol lu'ssinssrine ulu belbau uns'aa natha emp'poss, Usstan al'doer ol. Usstan shlubnaut fre'sla ulu tlu bauth nindol nesst.

Chris: Ha-HA! I thought so too! Man, Hussein, you crack me up!

- End footage Round 5. Roll footage Round 6. TH/TH 3-2 Mahariel. "

Harker: She backpedaled and lunged out again to find Theron mirroring her once again!

Mahariel: He took another scratch and made sure not to hurt her as he backed off to get a good look as he assumed the same stance.

Chris: I know I was just talking about Mahariel's excellent extension before, but wowee is Harker's nearly perfect. If you take a look, her sword arm is perfectly supported from underneath, so that the power is derived all the way from her core. That kind of stance makes it that much more advantageous if you opponent is trying to disarm you as well.

"Hussein": Usstan k'jakr xun naut kampi'un dos.

Chris: You know, I was thinking about that too, Hussein. It looks an awful lot like Mahariel isn't giving this match his all because he's fighting a woman. I don't know if that's sexism or consideration, but I have no doubt that walking on eggshells is going to come back to' uh' not not bite him.

"Hussein": - Flatly. - Nindol nesst laren ukt ilhar ril tangi.

- End footage Round 6. Roll footage Round 7. DIS/HC 3 All. "

Harker: She spun Tempest high again for Theron's upper arm.

Mahariel: He ducked as some of his hair was cut and moved back to how he stood. He tested his theory and knew getting better vantage was not easy.

Chris: Ha! Did I not say it' I said it. Friggin" love Harker's trap here, though. In the previous round, she deliberately reset her stance, thereby forcing Mahariel to back off and find a new line of sight. But by the precise way she arranged her footing, he could only really go in one direction. And when he fled, BOOM! She saw him coming a mile away. Did I not say walking on eggshells would suck eggs" Didn't I"

"Hussein": Usstan phlith dos xuil ril aglust d'ussta tluin. Dos ph'bran, kke, lu'dos gow d'tezzil gluesa.

Chris: You know" no one understands me like you do, Hussein.

- End footage Round 7. Roll footage Round 8. CP/LC 3.5-3 Mahariel. "

Harker: She bookended the cut and spun the longsword downward Theron's legs, but steel clashed against steel.

Mahariel: He dropped and used his blade to flick hers away as he stood. "You know for a lovely woman you duel well."

Chris: Because only butt-ugly women typically duel well. Actually, he's partly right. There are some chicks out there that duel who have a really mannish build. Not that I'm naming names or anything.

"Hussein": Usstan gumash elgg dos ditronw nin, wun alust d'jal nindolen lodias, lu'naut lor saph natha x'ianxin.

Chris: You know I thought that too, but I actually think Harker's bookend was pretty see-through. I dislike that Mahariel is so much on the defensive, though. The only way you get anywhere in this sport is by powering through the competition.

"Hussein": Vel'klar zhah nindel cahlind" Usstan shlu'ta kl'ae ol ulu elgg dos.

- End footage Round 8. Roll footage, Round 9. TH/TH 4.5-4 Mahariel. "

Harker: She crouched a bit and lunged out. Once again, Theron returned the favor. She inhaled sharply, the score was tight.

Mahariel: He shot forward meeting thrust once more and darted back.

Chris: Man! When I said their styles were alike, I was not exaggerating! Watching these two fight is like watching" some things that are equally similar.

"Hussein": Xun naut xta'rl uns'aa.

Chris: You look a little bit like a scenester, Hussein. What gives with this vest"

"Hussein": Usstan belbau dos ulu llar p'los dos noa dosst ivress. Llar....Draa...

Chris: Whoa! I just felt something. Uh' Jean' Is that you?

"Hussein": Uss shlu'ta er'griff kestal.

- End footage Round 9. Roll footage, Round 10 and 11. LC/LC 4.5-4 Mahariel; LP/FSS 4.5-5 Harker. "

Harker: Quickly, she danced back and away from Theron. Childhood ballet classes paid off once again.

Chris: Well I'll at least give Mahariel this: His eyes are where they need to be. It looks like his biggest threat is Harker's lower half. Kind of ironic since the upper half is the armed one. Get it' ARMED' - Laughs uproariously. "

"Hussein": Usstan xun naut rhseev z'lonzic yaith whol nindol.

Chris: Man, I'm good. I'm so good, I'm AHH!

"Hussein": Vel'bol" Yah, shlu'ta dos naut telanth sel'turi"

Chris: Thanks for being so concerned, buddy, but it was just my pant leg catching on the chair. I thought Jean was snuggling up to my ankle.

- End footage Round 11. Roll footage, Round 12 and 13. LC/HC 5.5-6 Harker; TH/TH 6.5-7 Harker. "

Harker: She gladly took the trade of cuts and scampered back a bit. Again the blades glided past each other. "Maybe I should have told you, I'm well known for long duels."

Mahariel: He bounced away and nodded. "Noted."

Chris: That's because she's a tactician! Harker notoriously spends most of her duels trying wear down her opponent. It's much easier to beat a frustrated opponent than it is to beat a scatterbrained one. In my experience, the former has always been prone to more mistakes.

"Hussein": Usstan phlith ussta emp'poss.

Chris: I know, right' There's no way they can be real!

- End footage Round 13. Roll footage Round 14. SL/HC 6.5-8 Harker. "

Harker: She brought Tempest downward in a feinted low cut and brought it up again for Theron's shoulder. She avoided getting stung by a slash.

Mahariel: He felt her blade bounce off the armor and stumbled. He nodded and laughed.

Chris: Ah, ah! An admirable attempt on Mahariel's part, but unfortunately it looks like the angle was all wrong for that swing. Now, see, had he actually managed to land that attack he could have potentially launched into a spectacular show of Gioco stretto, which is a sword fighting style that is all about grappling, disarming, and trapping your opponent in close proximity. It might be difficult given the size of Mahariel's blade, but if he can hone that particular technique as a failsafe I guarantee he'll climb the ranks in no time at all. Fuehlen does not always an expert swordsman make.

- Camera returns to the studio, where Chris seems engaged but "Hussein" seems bored. "

Chris: That was quite a feat for Harker, though. I always love it when it comes down to the wire and a duelist makes a wicked comebaAAAH!

- There is rattling close by. Chris looks nervously under the desk. "

Chris: Oh hi there, Jeanie. You're not going to hurt papa, are you? - Bleakly. "

"Hussein": - Rising. " Ka udos ph'kkuuth, Usstan tlun Lagvarguth. Usstan ssrig'luin ulu drital lozz'kizne ulu gotfrer nindol lu'lgarr.

Chris: Hussein, man! I thought we were just warming up to each other! - "Hussein" glares. - You can't leave me here with Jean! Do something!

- "Hussein" leaves, dropping his headset on the desk. "

Chris: Oh come on! Andrew" Can you help a guy ou" where are you going" Guys" DON"T LEAVE ME ALONE WITH JEAN!

- It becomes eerily quiet, aside from a distinct rattling, which gets progressively louder. "

Chris: Niiiiiiiiice Jeanie"

- End tape. "

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