Two Weeks Ago.

They had been getting closer and closer. She was watched nearly nightly, and even overheard mentioning his name in public or with friends. He wasn't happy, not a bit.

"I'm bored Con," He said. "You know I don't like being bored."

Connor was busily preparing for the next match, "I don't have the time for this." He growled into the mirror he sparred with. "Not now."

"You used to just go, fight or not. Remember?" He said. "This is important," Connor said.

"For what? More date money' You are going soft."

"Shut.Up." Connor shattered the glass of the mirror, watching the shards crash down around his boots. "Don't talk about her."

"Remember how you met her" I set that up!" He said.

Connor remembered, how could he forget. The big man, with the knife, he'd been a patsy, set up to take a fall, but Connor had to actually take him down, as he didn't want to stop. The man was intent on hurting her, and that is how he met...Laura. She wasn't overly tall, but neither was he. Curves in the right places, Auburn hair, beautiful eyes. The first few visits were as friends, then a night of watching a movie, there was a kiss, followed by another. She was celebrating a victory, in a way, he was too.

"Hey, Sucker. Your time is up, there's a guy out there waiting to beat your ass, I hope that he knocks sense into you," he said with a cruel laugh. Connor shook his head and nodded to the other man with them the ready, and started moving lightly on his feet, bouncing and ducking imaginary blows.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, The Main Event! He's been making a name for himself, now he's come out to challenge the reigning champion. He's weighed in at One hundred eighty-two pounds, Spider O"Neil!" The crowd erupted, he had been making a name for himself. "The Reigning Champion, weighing in at Two hundred, thirty pounds....Mike "The Hammer" Hammerstein!" Again there was another explosion of applause. Connor sat in his corner on the small stool, waiting, then the Ref called them in, he kissed the cross around his neck. A listen to the rules he could repeat in his head, and back to the corner he went. There was a bell, and the World fell silent.

"Wake up!" he said with a slap to Con's face. "I can't believe you did that!" "Huh' What'd I do?" Connor was groggy, and his head was swimming, he knew he'd taken a few heavy punches, he could feel the burn, and the ache of the fight.

"You killed him, you sly Son of a Bitch!" He was too happy, so Connor knew he was telling the truth.

"I killed him?" Connor was not wanting to believe it.

"Third round, you put bone fragments into his brain! God I thought you'd gone soft, you had me fooled, and you know that's not easy."

"God," Connor sighed, "I'm sorry, Mike."

"Sorry for what? He knew the risks!" He scolded. "You were just better than he was. He didn't do you any favors with that right side."

While he spoke, the fight played out in Connor's head. The first punch to the right side of his head, followed with a bone jarring blow to the left side of his body. Someone screamed, and it was him. Another punch for distraction, then another blow to the body. Every hit made lights go off like flash bulbs behind his eyes, the pain was intense, and he could see him cheering him on as he took control of the fight. A right to his temple, left to the jaw. Stunned. Move around and rabbit punch his kidneys. The Bell. The second round was Mike's. The big man moved easily around the ring, even Connor had trouble keeping up with him. He could hear him screaming at him when the blows would come, but the world was dark, and blurry. The Bell. Third round, pain in the ribs like breathing battery acid. The fight had to end. Uppercut misjudged, and the sound of cartilage and bone breaking, and Mike's green eyes rolling back into his head, and again the world went dark.

"Laura," Connor said, as he sat up, and started for the showers.

"This isn't about her, it's time to celebrate!" he said.

"I am going to celebrate, without you."

He watched as Connor walked up the drive to Laura's house. He heard the dog, Buster as he yapped and yelped, recognizing Connor's scent. "You will need me, you know..." he warned into the night air. "You always do."

"It's cold out here, Connor," He said, stamping his feet against the cobble of the road.

"Ye know, for someone claimin" to be bored so often, you sure are a whiner, William." He looked at the man beside him, then back toward her house.

"She wasn't alone again, the bald one was there last night," William stated, and Connor looked up at him with a glare.

"I told ye, I already know," Connor growled, then shoved his hand into his pocket, feeling the bone handle of the knife, ready to be pulled at any moment. "I saw them, same as you did, remember?"

"Ah, you brought it!" His excitement was obvious in his tone. "Is today the day' The day we see her throat open, and the crimson stain rolling down her neck, chest...eventually covering her perfect breasts?" William shuddered then.

"Yer sick," Connor said in disgust, and found himself standing alone. "And a child!"

He stood in silence for what seemed like hours, when he finally saw the auburn haired beauty that was Lola appearing, trying to get home before the darkness had settled in. Ever since the attack, she was more careful about the time, and seemed to be certain she was home, behind locked doors before the last rays of the sun disappeared. If she was with her brother, or flat mate, the time didn't hold the same meaning. Since the arrival of the bald one, she was even starting to push back to old habits. She was starting to know no fear, again.

Connor remembered the night he met her. Saving her from an attacker, a staged event that was close to going wrong. That night, and the few that followed left him thinking and longing for something normal this time, but this time was like the last, and the one before that. There was no "Normal" for Connor, not in this lifetime. He could see that she was in thought, and as always, it was easy to get close to her when she was lost in thought.

"Evenin", Beautiful," He said, and watched as she seemed to force a smile that used to come so easily.

"Connor - I was just thinking about you. Here, it's freezing outside, would you like to come in?" She tried to get the smile he had known for several weeks, but when her hands started shaking as she tried to unlock the door, he knew.

"Sure, if it's no trouble," Connor said, ignoring the act, for now.

"No, of course it's no trouble!" She offered coffee or tea, and he chose coffee, while watching her with her dog, and listening to her speak to him lovingly after scooping him up from the floor.

"Coffee, please," Connor answered, smiling at the dog's antics. "You've been keeping busy, yeah?" She started answering him, almost immediately as he bent down to pet Buster. "Evenin" Busta"," He said, listening to her talk about her cousin, Caro, taking over the Guild, and then she mentioned how bad it would have been if her Father had taken over. "So ye mentioned you were lookin" for me?" He asked, after listening to everything she said.

"Well, I was trying to decide if I should look for you. I went to one of Ollie's matches today..." He didn't have to hear the rest, he already knew. She heard of Mike's, and other's deaths, but he tried to remain nonchalant.

"Aye?" Her look was wide eyed and distressed.

"They say you killed someone in a match, just recently. That it's not the first time you've done it." She started chewing on her lower lip, a tell that showed she was nervous. He'd seen it the night she moved to kiss him, the night they stepped into a pool hall, and now. He knew she wanted him to deny it, but he couldn't.

He explained the matches were mis-matched. Heavy weights with Middle, and so forth. He told her the deaths were accidental, and his accent got thicker the entire time he tried to explain. She shook her head, and started wringing her hands while listening in disbelief.

"Why didn't you tell me about it when it happened" It must have been just terrible to kill someone, especially by accident. I can't even imagine what it's like. I would have," She paused, watching him with sad eyes. "I would have listened, if you wanted to talk about it."

He wanted to tell her that he didn't enjoy it, but truth was, he did enjoy it. The frustrations felt, while showing restraint, were let loose in the ring, with devastating effects.

"It's not something easily talked about, Laura." He finally lied. "I wanted to tell ye, but the words would hang up in me throat." He knew she didn't understand. He knew she felt betrayed, and while the scent of coffee wafted around them from the small kitchen, she turned away from him, as if unable to look at him. He knew it was the beginning of the end. "I'm sorry, Laura, I should have told ye, I....don't know what to say other than that."

He went on to explain about two of the deaths she may have heard of, how the bets were made and and another fight hadn't been stopped when it should have. He could hear her talking, but the rage was starting to ring through his ears.

"It bothers me that you killed a man, Connor, I can't pretend it doesn't." He watched her, unable to believe she just told him that. "But it bothers me more that you kept it a secret from me."

"I didn't think your brother would get into the illegal aspects of underground boxing, so I didn't think it would come up...just another, in a long line, of sins I have to live with, aye?"

She shook her head, staring at him even more distressed. Her knuckles were white as she laced her fingers. "You didn't have to live with it alone, Connor! I would have helped you share it, if you would have asked." Finally the hurt showed through in her words. They had fun, but he never really opened up about himself.

"If I would have told ye, Laura, then what? Would ye be feelin" any different?" He asked, and her facial expression changed again, She couldn't hide anything in answers to direct questions, he knew that about her.

"I don't know. It would still upset me, but," Another pause as she turned to look at him, "I wouldn't have felt so betrayed!" She was trying to be sure he understood how she was feeling, and it showed.

"Ah, betrayed," He nodded, "Can I say anything to make it a little better?"

"I don't know," She answered. "I just don't know. I really liked you a lot. I thought, maybe you did too, but now, I don't know." The words stung him a little, he would have lied if he said otherwise.

"Aye, ye are scared o' me now. I understand, betrayed a buildin" trust."

"I don't want to be scared of you," she said softly.

The conversation started going further and further down a dark road in his mind. She wanted him to leave the Bare Knuckle World, and a promise to continue seeing him afterward. There would be no closeness, no shared kiss, or close proximity pool lessons. Time would be spent, with honesty and compassion, a bump in the road of their possible lives she made it out to be.

Truth was, he couldn't retire. He enjoyed the fights, he enjoyed the pain. It was a way to keep himself in check, and under the radar.

"I should go then," He said, as he turned to walk from her house.

"I'm sorry, Connor. Be...be well."

"You too, Laura." he said, looking at the keys on the table near the door. "I hope to see you soon." He stepped out, closing the door behind him to the immediate sound of laughter.

"Go in there and leave her in a pool of her own blood! You have the knife, and the urge!"

"Not her..." Connor said, looking at the keys in his hand. "Not tonight." He continued the walk from her house, a new plan forming on seeing her again.